Why drinking is bad

I had sex with a friend of mine while I was extremely drunk. He had a girlfriend. I knew this at the time, and the only thing I said to him about her was “what about your girlfriend?” All he said was “doesn’t matter.” This happened 4 months ago. I’ve kept it a secret for 4 months. It’s my best friends whole group of friends. I never even told my best friend. Last night I was at a party with all of his friends, and I got really drunk and let it slip that I had sex with the guy while he was dating the girl. Before I knew it, everyone knew. Besides the girl. I agreed that I would tell her as soon as I could. I texted her this long paragraph explaining everything. All of our friends told me she went ballistic. She threw a chair. She was so upset she was balling her eyes out and couldn’t even talk. Everyone says it isn’t my fault because I was so drunk, but I feel really responsible. I feel so awful about it that it makes me sick. I know people are going to hate me. I know I won’t be able to come around them anymore. I need to lay low for awhile. There goes my whole break.

Drinking makes me feel bold. I use it as an excuse to do and say things I normally never would. I wish I didn’t have so many secrets to share. It’s all just building up in my system, waiting for me to explode. In one day my whole life was turned upside down again.

I was the other girl. I was the one who helped a guy cheat. I kept it a secret. I acted like it never even happened.

I am a whirlwind of emotions. I feel so out of control.